Success Blog

Unless you’re at the extreme top, you can’t choose who you work with. Here what you need to keep in mind when dealing with a difficult co-worker

MOVE AHEAD OF THE BLAME GAME

Do not get into direct accusation or blaming a single person for any blunder. Often, indirect language works because it puts the focus away from any one person and gets focus towards the problem at hand. A small change in words here and there will  go good. For example, instead of saying “You need to complete the report by xyz time”, try “Reports must be completed by xyz time.”

FEEDBACKS WORK

When somebody misses the deadline, let them know what’s in store for them and for the company. That would ensure he or she has an idea of how ugly things can get with delay. So be aware of the situation at office.

ADD A PERSONAL TOUCH

E-mails may be great when you are in no mood to speak with someone. But it’s very easy and vulnerable to come accross as sharp and rough with wrong words used. Use the phone or drop by their cabin to address sensitive issues.

KEEP IT BRIEF

While discussing problems, make sure you keep it short and direct.It minimises the stressful situation at both ends.

HANDLING A WHINER

Let’s face it. You cannot change a whiner but definetly keep a check on your interactions with them. Stay clear of open-ended questions limit your greetiongs to ‘Good Morning’ and’Good Evening.’ And who saying you can’t be busy alll the time, right?

DO YOUR HOMEWORK

You are going in to voice an idea or a report to your boss. And fumbling at key issues can get you in a lot of difficulty, especially for the boss who is waiting to find something to pick on you. And the only way out is getting a thorough research by your side.

DONT’ COMPLAIN

Think before you speak. Bring out negetive issues only if you plan to rectify them. VComplaing for the sake of complaiining can leave a bad impression and creat an unheathy environment.

LET GO OFF YOUR ANGER

It may be hard to let go off your feelings but on many occasions, that’s the best way out. A good way to get rid of them  is to write how you feel on a piece of paper and tear it off. Does sound kiddy but it works for those looking to drain those memories out.

DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY

 Keep it separate. A criticism (constructive or intended) of your work is not a criticism of you. Don’t let it come in your way of good self-esteem.

STICK TO THE POINTS

Whenever you’ve got to discuss something with a difficult co-worker, write down the main point and stick to them. No matter how many times does the conversation drifts away, come back.

KEEP PEOPLE IN THE LOOP

Keep your co-worker and bosses updated about every small development, maybe like a new deadline. Or else they cant react negatively.

DEAL WITH A SCREAMER

Tell the person that the screaming just makes the situation even more difficult and their can’t be a consensus till the screaming stop. Also remind him/her how unprofessional it is.

WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE

 Your own words can either create or solve a problem. Don’t make a situation worse by using harsh words or even abusing the person. Use neutral words.  A more diplomatic way would be to sympathise with the person, saying, “I understand it’s difficult for you to deal with this situation.”

MEASURABLE GOALS FOR EMPLOYEES

These goals should be measurable and specific rather than vague. Don’t expect your employees to achieve illogical standards in a short time. Give them the necessary period to put in that effort to get the desired results. For example, instead of saying, “I expect you to improve your attitude, “Say, “There will be no more incidents of raising your voice to another employee.”

STOP GOSSIP

If other people around you can’t stop gossiping, at least you can. Respond to the gossip with surprise and leave it over there. Gossipers just want to stir up trouble but if you make sure that you don’t respond, they will move on and the damage will be limited.

BE FRIENDLY WITHOUT GETTING TOO CLOSE

You need not be the best of friends with every one at work and need not gel with everyone. And yes, it’s perfectly okay. Its more important to have a friendly and cordial realtionship with your co-workers, but for emotional fulfillment, look outside work.

CULTIVATE SMALL TALK

Small talk can break that initial barrier and also make sure that you won’t be a stanger charging at them in alarming situations. Ask them about simple things like music, movies and hobbies. It need not be fun-filled exercise. But some cordial sharing of information is fine.

Keep Your Temper

The most important thing, do not raise your voice whatsoever. Keep your voice normal because there are high chances that the other person will be highly tempted to go overboard. Not only does it keep the tempo even, it also actually forces the person to listen.

DISH OUT COMPLIMENTS

It is a human tendency to look at other’s mistakes and dish them out with great ease. However, what’s difficult and more important is to look at what’s right in the person. An optimistic attitude in life goes a long way. It is just fair, isn’t it?

STAY OPEN MINDED

When someone criticises you, regardless of what you feel about them, think about it with an objective idea. Be responsive and consider improvement. It is actually oppurtunity for growth. Making an effort to be flexible means that you will have an easier time adapting to your company’s (inevitably) changing structures, and your open-mindness will make others want to work with you.

- Published in Bangalore Mirror.